Jelly Roll Reveals the One Person He Really Struggled to Forgive
By Movieguide® Contributor
Musician Jelly Roll is on a mission of forgiveness and compassion — but there was one person he really struggled to forgive: himself.
“I think accepting our responsibility and what we did is really hard for me,” he told podcaster Jay Shetty. “That was the hardest part of forgiving myself, was just really when I quit running out of ‘it was this person’s fault, it was that person’s fault.’ It took a long time for me to, as my father would say, ‘chew that pill’ of realizing that maybe it was me, you know?”
In his journey of forgiveness, Jelly Roll realized that he hadn’t forgiven himself.
“I was tired of forgiving everybody but me, and I couldn’t figure out what the problem was. I like, I forgave everybody. I don’t have a bitter heart about nothing.” Then one day he realized, “Like, you haven’t forgave you. And man, I just it hit me like a ton of bricks.”
Jelly Roll was born as Jason Deford to an alcoholic father and a mother who battled mental illness and drug addiction. It seemed his path was set, as DeFord quickly got involved in a life of drugs and crime.
When DeFord was 15, he was arrested for an armed robbery. Shetty asked DeFord if he had to opportunity to speak with his victim today, what would he tell them?
“I would just ask them to I would ask them to just one, forgive me,” he said. “There’s no excuse and that, the first accountability is no matter how old I was, I had no business taking from anybody. Just this entitlement that I had, this ‘the world owed me’ enough that I could come take your stuff.”
He also explained how he would hope his victim would give him grace and see that he’s spent the rest of his life making positive changes.
“Just what a horrible, horrible way to look at life… I would hope they would give me a little grace as I explain to him that I was 15 and I was just trying to be, I don’t know what I was even trying to be… what I did it made absolutely no sense. I learned so much from it and the way that I interact with people, and I hope that they would see that [I’ve] made it my life’s mission to change and to change people because that’s what I’m representing the most.”
DeFord now speaks in detention centers around the country to share his story. Earlier this month, he visited inmates in a substance abuse program after a counselor reached out to him on Tiktok.
“That day was super exciting, and not just because Jelly Roll is a celebrity, but because of what he’s been through,” said Lorelei Raikes, substance abuse program director. “He’s been through what the guys in my program, what they’ve been through.”
The clients also appreciated the musician taking time to work with them.
“I’ve heard a lot of his music, and to listen to him talk, it just let me know that he’s not that much different than the rest of us are. He’s become a better person, has got clean, and he’s doing his thing, and it lets everybody else know it’s possible,” said Shane Simpson, who is in the recovery program.
Movieguide® previously reported on DeFord’s faith in God:
“’God never called the equipped. God always equipped the call. I think that I am a living manifestation of that,’ DeFord told Fox News. Just like Noah and the building of the ark, God often chooses the most unlikely people to accomplish His will so that others will be drawn to Him. ‘I feel like God historically is always, you know, listen, Noah didn’t know anything about building a boat. He had no tradesmanship in building anything, and that’s who God picked to build an ark,’ the singer said.”
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